Are You Intexticated?!?

Since we had some crap weather heading our way, I arranged to have the Sponsor’s truck to drive to work and leave the Pirate at home. I was working nights and was not a happy camper when I was rudely ripped out of Dreamland not three hours after arriving by Mr. Slow’s announcement that he has to go to work early.

The Pirate's Christmas Bling

The Pirate's Christmas Bling: I lost the 'L' on the ride there, but later found it stuck to the left side panel. I would like to apologize to the citizens of the CSRA. That snow storm? Yeah, it was my fault. Sorry about that.

I grumpily roll my tired self out of bed and throw on the first set of wrinkled clothes I find in the dark room. I am pre-coffee and not quite awake. As I shuffle down the hall to grab my phone I mumble something along the lines of an official refusal to drive. I stumble down the driveway and climb into the passenger side of the truck and off we go.

A while later, I am jarred out of my sluggish too-damn-early-for-this state of mind by the telltale noise of tires bouncing over the interstate’s rumble strip. What the hell? I look over at my husband eyes cast down, playing with his phone, which he is holding in his right hand resting on the center console.

“Are you freaking texting?!?”

He response: “No. I’m just checking something.”

That does it. “You should know better!” I’m incredulous. “I have to dodge assholes like that every time I go to work and you are one of THEM?!?”

“I wasn’t texting.”

Now I’m pissed. I try to snatch the phone out of his hand, he’s faster, but I’m more tenacious and finally succeed in grabbing his phone and shove it into the little space on my door handle.

“What the hell does it matter what you were doing?!? You are weaving all over the damn road! Texting fucking kills. What would you do if some asshole made your wife wreck herself? Or worse, kills her.”

He is starting to argue the point; I can see it in his body language. Then he finally hangs his head: “I’m sorry. You’re right. You are absolutely right. I’m a professional driver. I get overconfident when I’m in my own truck.”

“You do that shit when you’re driving in the big truck?”

“Hell, no! I can’t afford to.”

“You are forgiven. Don’t let it happen again. You know I’m gonna shred you on my blog, right?”

“You have every right to. I deserve it. I know better.”

“Damn, straight.”


6 Comments on “Are You Intexticated?!?”

  1. Jamie Lynn says:

    Sorry. I’m guilty too. 8-( I even car dance and drink coffee while Texting and driving… I am an addict and need a program.

  2. Strega_Rossa says:

    Who hasn’t lit a cigarette, dropped said cigarette, drank coffee, spilled said coffee, driven with kids, tried to break up a fight or given a kid a cookie. Who hasn’t looked down for a moment or been distracted? Yea when we drive cars we have to watch for motorcycles. But even more… when we ride we have to watch for distracted drivers or suffer the consequences.

  3. MsXXFast says:

    I admit I do it. However I auto complete most of It as my fingers know where the letters are. My friends just need to understand my typos lol. I don’t have many friends to text to however, lol. I admit, I tweet more. I know it isn’t an excuse that I’ve never had a problem while doing so I can justify it. I DO know that I’m able to do it better than others I know who look down once and they’re hitting the rumblestrips. You know, the tap, look, tap tap, look, tap, look method–never when it’s congested. But it’s still not right. I get super pissed when S does it when I’m in the truck because he is horrible at it. And I know he does it more when I’m not there. I mean truly, he can’t do anything and drive at the same time and stay in the lines. It’s like driving with Braille. It makes no sense because he can thread the needle and lean on people in a turn on a bike, and can race (and win) in open wheel cars. Just dont let him have a phone and drive a car simultaneously. Anyway, sorry…I do it.

  4. MissBusa says:

    I admit I am guilty of it, too. 😦 However, for some reason I think I can afford to do it because I know how to drive, and I’m not all over the road and still pay attention and have my eyes where they belong with quick glimpses in between. I justify it, again, with thinking I drive better than 99% of the people on the road. I read traffic patterns, I am proactive, and I have never been in a car wreck in my entire life where I was driving; I suppose that is what I use as an excuse. I’m a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to that. Hubby usually doesn’t swerve either. He did stay in his lane and there was absolutely no traffic whatsoever around us. I don’t know… I suppose it comes down to trust and control issues. It’s ok for me to do it, because I trust in my abilities as a driver and I know when I’m in control or when I’m taking it too far. Joe does the same thing, but he gets my verbal boot up his ass. What probably pissed me off was the fact that he could have handed me the phone and asked me to do it. But I know I would have declined, because I get carsick fairly quickly when I’m not looking in the direction of travel. 😦 I limit myself but yes, I too still do it. 😦

  5. Keith says:

    The Mrs. rules, cuz as a former d/m, they NEVER caved in so easily. Rule with a leather (motorcycle) boot. Ride safe.

  6. Joshua says:

    This is exactly why I’m glad I’m not driving cars anymore. In Taiwan, it’s scooters (50cc, so don’t laugh too much!) only for me and it’s kind of hard getting away with texting on the way to work 🙂


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