Over-Extended and Under-WhelmedPosted: March 15, 2011 I never envisioned racing … scratch that: WANTING to race being so much stinking work! I’m really getting overwhelmed. Right now it is really looking like the work-fun ratio is way off. I’ve spent countless hours doing things I’ve never thought I would have to do. Things like becoming a damn motorcycle mechanic, or a graphics designer, or a promoter… a sign maker, automotive painter, girly-girl, social butterfly… good grief! And for what? Six laps around the track. SIX laps in a sprint race. I’m really beginning to doubt my sanity. I spend every penny I make on the bike. I don’t do anything but work, ride, and wrench. I try to learn gearing, have a suspension that can’t be tweaked within necessary range unless I buy new innards. I’m supposed to hit the gym to work on my endurance, but I don’t find the time not to mention the energy. I had to ditch the daily blog post, because I just couldn’t keep up with everything. There is so much to do and so little time. My brain has been smoking for weeks now. And what it all comes down to? Six laps. Six laps and a gradual increase of a dislike for street riding. I’m bored with it. More often than not I find myself irritated by people’s grandiose stupidity when driving.
I have actually been approached by several people who asked if I wanted to ride with them. I turned every single one of them down. They probably thought me a snob. I am not. I just don’t trust anybody else’s riding anymore. Where is this coming from? I mean, I have never liked group riding; at first it was because I didn’t feel my skill was advanced enough to be riding in a group. After a while, I tried it and had to find out that it isn’t really for me, so I started hanging in the back because I had to admit to myself that I was a control freak when I’m on the bike and I can control what is in front of me… well, I can’t control it, but I can keep it under control. Now I just don’t want to anymore. But I really do. I dig the camaraderie of motorcycling, but how can I be a biker if I can’t find it within myself to ride with them?
I am really torn. I think I have opened a stale can of beer when I jumped into this racing thing and sliding feet first… into last place; unless it’s Women’s Superstock. =D But then again, there is something wrong with this analogy… I think it doesn’t officially count if you cross the finish line sliding sideways on your ass… since the transponder is stuck to the bike.
When I’m at the track it’s all worth it! But when I’m doing grunt work it really doesn’t seem all that beneficial. I can see where serious racing (of the privateer variety) is a full-time job and the actual racing is only 1% of it.
I’m a 1%-er. And I’m starting to dislike street riding. However, Mr. Slow put that one to the test: He asked me if I would moan and groan and think that way if I had to drive to work. I replied that it would depend on the car. He says: “A fishing car. A POS. Because that’s all that you can afford.” I gave him a disgusted look: “Hell no! I guess street riding still beats the pants off of caging it.”
There I have it. I’m unhappy on the street. Or so I think. When it really is just a matter of missing the kind of riding I get to do at the racetrack. I grow impatient between track days. Or so I think. When it really is just a matter of having so much work to do to prep for my first road race and then for my first official LSR meet that I just can’t give my brain a break. I need to reboot and relax.
Why is it taking me so darned long to be ready? I must be over-thinking again. But then again, that is all I have. I am now at a point where most of my riding skill training has to be done in my brain. No wonder I am so freaking slow in the straights. I never bother with those… besides I have been conditioned to observe the speed limit with my 3-point license.No way I could have been ready for Roebling Road this weekend, even if Mr. Slow hadn’t messed up the date of his wedding photo gig.
Overwhelmed with race prep, work, chores and life’s little messes; and just can’t seem to be catching up. Underwhelmed in the amount of real throttle time I get, so please excuse my ramblings… I haven’t seen redline in quite some time. That isn’t true either. It’s only been a month and it’s only a month until my first WERA race.